Now I know why people are scared of dentists.
2pm: Sit in dentist chair
2:10pm: Get shot with Novocaine for the first time ever. Didn't hurt.
2:20pm: Dentist shoves 4 objects into mouth. One cut into the gum. Another poked my tongue. Another forced my mouth open wider than imaginable. Another ground away at my teeth in a way that gave me constant goosebumps and sent shooting pains down my jaw...cheek felt numb..and that's about it.
The worst part:
I have a tongue. It moves when it wants. I can't really control when it wiggles inside my mouth. I have a throat. It instinctively swallows when it senses liquid rolling down my airway.
The dentist kept telling me to control my tongue. He kept telling me to put it to the back of my mouth. I was TRYING, DUDE! I tried to think of pretty horse ranches and sunny beaches and tell myself that I was going to get shot if I swallowed one more time but then my throat would swallow and I'd get chewed out again.
At one point he said, "Whenever you do that you just make my tool go into your tooth further." I couldn't even attempt a sassy retort (like, "if you give me a break every now 'n then maybe I could actually swallow) because my mouth was clamped open.
I didn't even get a free toothbrush. End of vent.
Ugh! Sounds miserable. I think you need to find a friendlier dentist.
ReplyDeleteOh, my word!! What was so horribly bad that he had to clamp your mouth open to do it?!?! Has he ever heard of the little vacuum thing to suck out liquid from your mouth? Agreed...you need a different dentist.
ReplyDeleteI hope you found this funny in retrospect! I do the same thing! I can't help but swallow and my tongue moves no matter how hard I concentrate on it NOT moving!
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